My favorite friend Michael gave this to me after one month and I about died laughing so hard. It was kinda cool to see after so much time has pasted and I could laugh at how swollen I was and how funny I sounded. =)

Workin' hard

Monday I had another follow up apt with the oral surgeon. The bands came off temporarily and I could talk for the first time since the surgery. What an experience! It felt so good to talk as soon as I thought something rather then hesitating knowing nobody could understand me. Unfortunately that only lasted 5 minutes while I brushed my teeth real good and then the bands went back on. I was surprised to find out that the retainer was wired on by my braces so it wasn't going to come out for another 2-4 weeks. Doc said it depends on my jaw healing into place. Next week he said I should be able to learn how to remove the bands myself so I can clean my teeth better and easier.

Monday was interesting at work. The doctor's office accidentally put the wrong date on my work release form so I had to wait while HR got a revised fax from them. That took about an hour due to the doctor being busy with other surgeries. So I didn't start work until 2 p.m. and went home at 4 because it had already been a long day starting at 11 a.m. for me. Everyone at work was surprised and happy to see me (I think) and it hit me that it's going to be more difficult than I thought to not be able to talk at work. I went home and passed out.

Today I worked from noon to 4:30. I seemed to do ok but then I had to go to a mandatory employee meeting about all the changes that were going on. That took an hour and then I was done for the day. Hopefully next week I can get more food into me and my energy level will increase and work won't exhaust me so much.

The headaches and pain in my teeth are not getting better. I've taken more of the children's liquid ibuprofen pain medicine now then I did after I was released from the Hospital. I can't blow my nose so my sinuses are swollen and cause pain and my teeth hurt because I still have my braces on. It sucks because all I want to do is sleep but sleep hurts my jaw. It's a double edged sword.

Favorite channel?

It's Friday, day 12 of my recovery and the feeling in my face is very slowly coming back. I get little tingles in my face now and then. The swelling has has gone down but not the drooling! Ugh, anyways still not enough energy yet to do very much. Forced myself to go to the store today to get more milk and instant breakfast for my attempt at going back to work on Monday, that is if the doctor thinks I'm ready. I just hope that my constant headache will subside. It's the worst in the morning when I wake up and sometimes when I've taken a nap or lying down. My whole head hurts and it feels like I have fluid in my ears. My neck hurts and my back hurts so bed is the only thing that relieves that.

So what do I do with all my time while I'm recovering? Well, being that I don't have much energy to do much and drooling limits me to things that I can't drool all over, I watch tv...a lot. My favorite channel? The Food Network. Yep, as cruel as it sounds to tease myself with images of really good food, I'm very into it. I don't cook much usually with my super busy schedule of work and school, but now that I have more time on my hands cooking seems very fun and I look forward to trying some of the easy recipes that I've seen on some of the shows. Rachel Ray and Patty's Home Cooking are my favorites. I look forward to trying some of these recipes and more importantly, taste them!

My roommate suggested I have a big dinner as soon as I can eat solid food again. My idea was an all you can eat buffet. Sounds good to me!

Scary but funny

So I had what was the best and the worst day yesterday. I had more energy then I ever had, and there wasn't much pain. I went to get a massage from my aunt to help with my back and neck tension and I felt much better. Then somehow I hit a huge steep slope. I all of a sudden had constipation and I went to clean my teeth (or attempt to) and I was excited that my upper lip had loosened up and wasn't numb or swollen that i could lift it up to clean my gums and higher. What I found was what I thought were nerves sticking down from my lip. I was horrified! They are white where they are attached and dark brown at the tips. I figured that the tips must be dying or something and that's why they weren't under the skin anymore. So today, I emailed the doctor asking if this was something normal or if I should be concerned. I didn't get a response for a few hours so I had my roommate call the office to ask the surgery coordinator what she thought. She said it was probably stitches but should come in just in case. Finally the doctor replied to my email and he said they were my stitches and would disolve on their own. OH! Whew! Ok, well that's better. So that was kinda funny because I really thought they were nerves! My friend Michael even asked, "How do you know they are nerves?" I told him that they are white and when I pulled on one it hurt! The brown tips must be from all the liquid chocolate instant breakfast I eat everyday. Didn't know I had stitches so it was the only logical thing was nerves. Ha!

Follow up #2

Went to see the doc again on Monday. I finally got to see my model impression that the doc had done a pretend surgery on. Very exciting because I got to see what my teeth will look like since I can't see them even currently in my mouth. Then they just gave me a little irrigation cleaning. They basically put some medical strength mouth wash on my teeth and sucked it back out. Doc told me I am able to drive this week and I need to take more walks if I have the energy. He said that next week they will take the rubberbands off to give me a good teeth cleaning (finally) and possibly show me how to take the bands off myself so I can clean my teeth in the future.

So the one thing he told me that I had mistconstrued was that I can open my jaw but have to wear the bands longer than I thought. I thought it was bands for two weeks and then I just couldn't open my jaw do to bone and muscle re-alignment but he told me that I could open my jaw with the bands off but wear the bands for much longer. However, I think that I am healing a little faster then they thought so it may be different for different people. Good news either way. I look forward to getting this retainer thingy out of my mouth.

The pain hasn't been all that bad but I am getting sinus headaches because I can't blow my nose and little sticks of pain in my teeth and jaw. I wake up with a headache and go to sleep with a headache so it seems that when I'm lying with my head down the pressure on the jaw causes some pain. My back hurts all day from not working as much so I'm getting a message today to try to release some tension. Other than that my appetite has stayed the same but my taste for things is slowly coming back. I finally drank some other juice and had some tomato soup which needed much milking down and more salt to satisfy my taste but once I did was good.

Random stuff

So I thought of some stuff I left out of the last post but intstead of making that one longer I figured I would just write a new one.

I've lost 10 lbs so far since the surgery and i'm trying not to loose anymore but finding it difficult to drink enough without getting too full.

I had my first follow up with the oral surgeon on Thursday and that was very weird. I had to go into the office full of people and have them stare at me because I look like a cabbage patch doll. Plus I look lethargic because it hurts to turn my head too much so I just face forward and down most of the time so the drool doesn't run down my face. So they took xrays which are really difficult to do when your swollen and your back hurts. They turned out though and when I saw all the screws and plates I asked the doc when those come out. He told me they don't which was a total surprise to me. I knew I would have screws and plates but didn't know they didn't come out ever! Doc assured me that they were very small and made out of titanium so I wouldn't be setting off any airport alarms or getting magnets stuck to my face! The xrays look good so I'm still very excited about the results. My next follow up is on Monday. Not sure what they are following up on but we shall see.

Last night I was able to suck for the first time and was able to get more liquid down my throat then ever before. Cold things are what really works right now because I can tell that they are there. My thirst and hunger are growing significantly which is somewhat good. It's just so messy to try to eat because it's not like I can sit down for a meal, I have to stand over a sink so everthing that falls all over the place doesn't ruin all my clothes or furniture. I'm looking forward to being able to drink through a straw and that sounds so alien to me but it's true! You really take the littel things for granted and don't appreciate them until you don't have them temporarily.

Getting more feeling in my mouth. I can feel most of my tongue again and the tip of it is sensitive and a litte rough from rubbing on the rubber retainer thingy I have in the top of my mouth.

This morning I cried for the first time. My independent spirit is getting to me and I am frusterated that I can't just do what I need to do which is go to the store and get more cat food. I don't really like relying on people and hate asking for favors and it's finally hit me a little that i'm going to need more favors than I thought. My family and friends have been great and there is no lack of hospitality I just hate bothering people for things that I feel I may never get to return the favor. I don't know anyone that plans on having jaw surgery anytime soon! Anyways, I'm sure some can understand my frusteration.

So on a lighter side I have to say how funny people are when you can't really respond to them. If I had a dollar for every time somone would ask "x or y?" and I would just give them this blank stare like "how in the heck am I supposed to respond to that?" So I just nod and mumble "uh huh" and then they realize that I can't really answer that kind of question without writing it down. Of course I'm being asked this at the moments where I don't have my white board or computer in front of me. It's just funny that people at first forget that I can only really respond to yes or no questions and that sometimes it requires more of an explanation. Anyways, it's been my comedy relief to talk to people and find it funny that they get more frusterated then I do that I can't really talk. I can still think, just can't express myself as much but maybe that's a good thing! I also love how everyone finds it funny that I knew to have a whiteboard. How else was I going to communicate? I could have a pen and paper but and that would work just as well. I like writing in word better because I can type faster than I can write. Writing on the white board, people seem to loose patience and want to guess what I'm trying to say. Or they will ask a second question in the middle of my writing the answer to the first one. Very funny. So i just keep writing the first one and then erase and write the second one. It's a good thing I didn't loose my short term memory or I would be screwed!

Ok, Wow

Sorry to those who probably have been checking this every day since the surgery, but the last 5 days have been quite difficult.

My surgery went very well according to my doctor. I have posted some pictures that they took during surgery (hope they're not too gross) I have some others of just after surgery and the days to follow but I have to collect them from people.

Going into surgery was nerve racking but everyone was very nice and they worked with me well. I met with the hospital's RN where she went over all my "stats" with me and made sure all my information was correct. Then I met the anastesiologist who talked to me about the surgery a little bit. Then they gave me a little "happy juice" shot and I passed out so fast because I was already so tired from it being so early. Then I woke up from surgery, they moved me into my recovery bed and room and then I woke up to my dad next to me. Instantly I had major nausea and I was vomiting blood and stomach acid because there was nothing in my stomach and they were unable to pump my stomach after surgery because my throat was too swollen.

I was surprised that the hospital wasn't more prepared for me. My dad told me that while I was vomiting I was asking for suction because I couldn't get the blood vomit out of my mouth fast enough and it took them 45 minutes to get authorization to give this to me. He and I both thought that was crazy. I ended up vomiting like a gallon of blood/stomach acid the rest of the day Monday through Monday night and into Tuesday morning. Finally the nausea calmed down but they kept giving me demeral shots so that was causing more nausea. I wasn't impressed with the hospital's lack of knowledge about what kind of recover I needed because one of the nurses asked me what I wanted to eat and I told her like a milk shake or a breakfast drink. She brought me ice cream and a spoon. Um, I'll remind those who don't know but my mouth was rubberbanded shut and I was swollen like a chipmunk and you could read this on my chart that I couldn't open my mouth but she brought me a spoon. Then she brought me mashed potatoes and gravy with a straw. WOW! That's all I can say. The doc had to finally tell them what kind of food I needed and I told them what I needed but thought it was a little weird that they didn't know this already.

Tuesday was interesting because I did a complete 160. I felt really good mostly because of the pain meds but I wasn't vomiting and that was awesome. I had lots of visitors and the day just flew past. Wednesday was a different story. Doc told me it would get even worse from there. He said you have a jolt of energy after the first day but then the anastesia wearing off takes its toll and you loose energy quickly. That I did. Slept most of the day but you get bothered every like 20 minutes in the hospital of nurses wanting to check your vitals, bringing you food, or asking if you need anything. I was like "leave me alone! I just want to sleep!" Doc said I could go home Wednesday but I was affraid to leave my trusty suction machine. He convinced me that I would do fine without it. Ha! Drooling is such a pain. You have to understand that the drool is because your body naturally creates more when your trying to heal, plus my whole mouth is swollen and numb and I can't feel that there's drool, plus it hurts to swallow so the less the better. Man does the drool suck. I went through like two boxes of tissues on Thursday. I've learned to use washclothes so that they aren't as rough on the face and you can wash them so they are re-usable.

So went to the hotel on Wednesday because the pipes in my condo were getting re-lined and I didn't want to deal with it. The hotel was nice. No nurses or doctors. Nice big cushy bed and I could close the curtains and make it real dark so I could sleep better. Which, by the way, doesn't happen much when your drooling constantly. I would go in and out every 45 minutes, wake up with a puddle of drool from my face just feeling so gross. And you can't just spit the drool out because I have this plastic retainer thingy between my front teeth which blocks any fluid from going through my teath very well. So I blow the spit out and make lots of bubbles. I feel like a kid in the bath tub blowing bubbles in the water but with much grosser substance. Eating is a very difficult task. I have to shove a plastic tube attached to a surrenge into my mouth twards the back of my teeth and try to push fluid into my mouth so I can swallow it. What makes this difficult, again, is I can't tell what's in my mouth because it's swollen and numb so you just kinda swallow in hope your getting something but 2/3 of it comes shooting back out your mouth. Lovely i'm sure. Plus your drooling so it doesn't just drip it slowly falls down your face. (yuck I know) As the days have gone by this has gotten a little easier as I get more feeling in my mouth back and it doesn't hurt as much to swallow, but now i'm finding that because I have to drink more fluids each day rather then just have three meals, my mouth is getting sores from where I shove this tube into it each day. I found that my favorite thing so far is the instant breakfast chocolate drink and apple juice. I tried other things like ensure, fruit smoothies, and even soup and my pallet just isn't quite where it was just yet. Things tast different when it's only the taste buds on the very back of your tongue.

I'm home finally, and don't have much energy to do much. I finally took my first self shower and it felt nice to get completely clean on my own. I had taken a bath at the hotel but it was difficult because it's hard to stretch the neck because it pulls on the jaw. So leaning back to dip my head to rinse was a little scary. Shower is much easier. Vicki gave me a rocket blender which is like a bullet (as seen on tv) so you can blend things in individual portions. So far, I haven't really used it because I can't pallet anything else yet but I think once I do it will be really handy.

So tomorrow is Sunday, Michael and Erin are coming over for smoothies and super bowl.

Oh! and for those that sent flowers, thank you thank you! I really enjoy having them in my room to look at!

I'll try to post more pics as I get them. Thanks again to all that visited and helped during my recovery!